Seven Weeks Post Stem Cell Transplant - Christmas Parties, Preparations and Balance

Christmas is my favourite time of year. On Friday, I went with Hubby and some friends to Lumina Borealis on Friday night. This is a magical, interactive light show that is currently being shown at a local tourist attraction. I had a great time as the snow fell from the sky and we wandered through the exhibit. My friend and I sang into the microphone and saw our voices make changes in the shape and colours on the walls. What a great night it was! I felt like a little child and I wanted to spin with my arms outstretched. However, the adult part of me restrained myself and I wandered through with a big smile on my face.

Saturday, we enjoyed a dinner with friends at their home. Hubby and I enjoyed good food and great company until I ran out of gas and needed to head home. We did not need to walk very far to get home as we live in the same neighbourhood.

Sunday morning, I went to church and then headed straight home. I was very tired but also excited to see my son who was on his way home for the Christmas holidays. Hubby took me out for a late breakfast. We had just arrived home when our son arrived. I'm so happy to have him home. He was excited to show us his report from his teaching placement and he also showed us a test that he had written for the students in the class. I am happy that he continues to have such enthusiasm for his career.

Yesterday, I had a couple of appointments and then went shopping for Hubby's Christmas present. Then last night, I was at another of Hubby's Christmas parties. I was exhausted when we arrived home last night. I ate too much greasy food and had an unhappy stomach through most of the night. Thank goodness the stomach eventually calmed down early this morning. However, I had a disrupted, sleepless night.

As a result, I slept in and my body let me know all day long that it was tired. Normally after sleeping in, I won't need to sleep again during the day. Not today. I ended up having heavy eyes while sitting on the couch this afternoon so I went and had a nap. Hubby woke me up in time to eat some supper. I'm still tired and I will go to sleep early tonight. I have a big day tomorrow.

Tomorrow, I will do my grocery shopping in preparation for our Christmas dinners and birthday lunch for my daughter. After all that shopping, tomorrow night I will go with Hubby to another Christmas party.

Thursday and Friday, I will be busy baking and cooking so I can visit with family on the weekend and still put together a good meal. In order to survive this busy time of year, I will be needing to go to bed early and perhaps even having small cat naps to rejuvenate myself. Despite the busy-ness, I still love this time of year.

6 weeks Post Transplant - Set Backs

Overall, I continue to do well but my body lets me know when I've done too much. This week I have been planning my Christmas baking, Christmas activities and trying to schedule in rest days. I made my last batch of Christmas cookies on Monday. Then I decided to make my cinnamon rolls that my daughter likes to have for Christmas morning. The recipe for these cinnamon rolls came from my grandmother and I remember her serving them when we would visit her and grandpa on the farm. They are easy to make and really good. I made them yesterday. I've been working on sending out my Christmas cards. Again, I try to schedule in rest times as well.

Last night, my body let me know that I have been too busy. I was really tired around 8:10 p.m. but my stomach was showing signs of rolling and upheaval. So I took my Olanzapine which controls the nausea. Unfortunately, it was not successful and I had a disrupted night. I was supposed to go for a walk with my cousin-in-law this afternoon and I was really looking forward to it all week. I am very tired this morning and so I have cancelled out. I know she will understand and I'm hoping that we can get together next week sometime.

I was also supposed to get some groceries done today but that may also be put on hold until my body is up to it. I know I could rely on Hubby to do the groceries, but I am wanting to be involved with the groceries this week and also next week when we will do the groceries for celebrating Christmas and my daughter's birthday which is Christmas Day. Again, I have to schedule in rest times.

I know I'm getting stronger and better when I am frustrated with having to sit and rest. Life is too short but I also need to make sure that my body is rested. Otherwise, I will have more nights and days like last night where I am a friend to my bathroom and can't leave it.

On days like today when I am resting, I have time to reflect on the Christmas/Advent season. I recognized this morning as I lit my Advent candles for Hope and Peace that it is much too easy to let the busy-ness and consumerism of Christmas intrude and distract me from my real reason for Christmas. This is the time to sit, reflect and wait patiently for Christ's arrival on Christmas Day. Wait patiently for family to arrive. Wait patiently in Hope and Peace for my body to heal. Wait patiently and quietly while at the same time keep the busy-ness at bay. Waiting patiently and quietly during this Advent season also gives me time to reflect and pray for Hope and Peace not just for me personally but within my home, community and within the world. Especially for Peace at this time of world upheaval and intolerance. Peace and intolerance cannot cohabitate together. So perhaps my prayers for today should be for a decrease in the intolerance that is found in our communities as well as in the world.

6 weeks Post Stem Cell Transplant and Embracing Christmas

So tomorrow the "new" me will be 6 weeks old. I had a check up at the Cancer Clinic this past Wednesday and my blood levels are doing well. I was given permission to get my flu shot which will prevent me from catching some of the flu germs that are in the general public domain. At my check up, I was also told that I will have a CT scan within this next month  and it will confirm conclusively that I am in remission.  I don't have to go back for another check up until 2 months from now. Woo Hoo!! Life is great!

I love this time of year. I love all the Christmas music which includes the sacred Christmas carols but also the secular Christmas music. I have it on in the house and in the car. This music lifts my spirits and helps me to prepare and wait for Christmas day. Some people may call me naïve. I don't care. I still believe in the birth of Christ and I eagerly embrace all things Christmas during Advent. I have an Advent wreath that my sister-in-law gave me for Christmas many, many years ago. I love to light the candles and reflect on their meanings. I do this in the quiet moments of the morning before life gets busy. I light them every day in their order. So last week, only one candle was lit all week long. This was the candle of "Hope". This morning is the second Sunday in Advent so while all was quiet, I lit the candle of "Peace". In my personal reflection, I hoped for peace to reign throughout the world. Hope for a calming influence on the leaders of the United States and North Korea. Hope for world peace. These were part of my reflections this morning.

Another part of my reflections was hoping for my family to spend time together during Christmas this year. My daughter's work schedule may allow for us to have just one day together. This Christmas is very special for me. I am very blessed and fortunate to be here. So I hope for my family to be able to be together for Christmas Day at the very least. We will celebrate Christmas but also my daughter's birthday as she was the best Christmas present many years ago.

In the spirit of embracing Christmas, this past week included 3 Christmas parties and a hockey game. I had a wonderful time at all of them. They were an opportunity to see people that I care about and visit with them. The last party was held last night. I had a very filling turkey dinner which was topped off with a sherry trifle and a cup of tea. This morning, I was wanting to go to church and celebrate the second Sunday in Advent. I wanted to contribute to my church's White Gift project. However, this morning, my busy week has caught up to me and I'm feeling very tired and achy. So I have listened to my body and stayed home from church. I truly believe that God will forgive me and appreciate my own reflections on this Sunday of Peace.

Advent will continue and I will continue to wait and prepare for Christmas Day where I will celebrate the arrival of the birth of my saviour, Jesus Christ. I will also eagerly await and prepare to celebrate my family being all together. The four of us have not been together since February. My children fill me with warmth and this year is a special Christmas to celebrate us all together again.

Day 31 and Day 32 Post Stem Cell Transplant

As a reminder, once I had my stem cell transplant, then I am just like a newborn baby. All my vaccinations have been wiped out and I will have to get them all redone. This is why I am posting as Day 31, etc. Eventually I will be posting like newborn ages of 6 weeks, 2 months, 3 months, etc.

Day 31 - Friday, December 1

Yesterday, Thursday, November 30, I did not get my groceries done in the morning. I did make it to the bank, but I started to feel nauseous and I wanted to go to the Women's Institute Artisan and Craft Show with my cousin-in-law. I rested in the morning and then went out in the afternoon. I had a lovely afternoon at the craft show and then back to my cousin's home for a cup of tea and gingerbread cookies. The afternoon flew by and I had to leave to meet Hubby at his work. We then enjoyed a nice dinner together at a local sports bar.

Hubby took today, Friday, December 1 off as a vacation day. We went grocery shopping in the morning and came home for lunch. I was feeling a little tired so I had a brief power nap. Then we made our way to the downtown to do some Christmas shopping (stocking stuffers) and enjoy walking in the outdoors. We did some touristy things in our downtown and we enjoyed a lovely cup of tea (coffee for Hubby) at Musiikki Café. Before this was a quaint café that hosts small musical ensembles in the evening, it used to be a retail store. A friend used to own the store and we were very happy to see the space now has a great vibe to it. Although we enjoyed our tea break, it was really a break for me to rest and regain some energy to continue with our day.

Although we had not been successful in finding stocking stuffers, we did find some treasures for ourselves. I love the store, Send in the Clowns, and I found advent candles which have been scarce and hard to find. I bought enough for this year and next year's Advent season. I use them with my Advent Wreath which is put out and I reflect on every Advent and Christmas season. I also found a lovely set of Christmas cards that I can now start sending them out to family and friends through the mail.

Hubby bought himself a new shirt from a local men's store that is closing in a couple of weeks. It is a retirement closing and the owner is really looking forward to a Christmas break. This gentleman has never had a holiday between Christmas and New Years!

While Hubby and I were meandering and shopping, we stopped into one of our favourite stores. The floors are still the old, creaky hardwood and they have a great selection of imported foods and local, artisan foods. We went in just to browse but we weren't expecting to find anything exciting. But......I had only taken a couple of steps inside the store when I recognized the logo of a brand of Scotch that I love.  Obviously this store does not sell alcohol but what I saw was my favourite whisky fudge. Glenfarclas Whisky Fudge!! Hubby saw my eyes light up. He saw me get a spring to my step. He also saw me make a fast beeline to the display. We bought 3 tins which I'm going to hide until Christmas time. What a fantastic treat this will be on Christmas Day when my children will be home and we can share as a family.

After buying the fudge, Hubby and I decided to make our way up the main street to our car. Once we got there, we carefully put our packages into the car and made our way to our favourite Indian restaurant for dinner. I haven't been there since the day that I was admitted to hospital back in October. My taste buds are still slightly off and I've been afraid to try my favourite Indian foods in case they don't taste good to me or that they don't sit well with me. Tonight, though, I'm willing to try it. I ordered a dish that I haven't had in a long time. I always enjoy it but it is very, very mild. This would be my first foray into reintroducing this cuisine to my body. It was good. I did try some of Hubby's Saag Aloo (a potato and spinach side dish) and I found it very tasty. Again, it is a mild dish.

Our plan for the day was to finish it off by attending the Kingston Frontenacs OHL hockey game. We were willing to be flexible on this item of our day as it would depend on my energy levels and how well I felt. My power nap must have helped me out as I had the energy and willpower to attend the game. I thoroughly enjoyed the game although I started to yawn as the time that I normally go to bed came and went. It was so nice to be out and about! As soon as I got home, I headed off to bed.

Day 32 - Saturday, December 2

Today will be a rest day. I will go out and finish the groceries with Hubby in the morning and then I will rest for the rest of the day.  I will put up my nativity scene and get my Advent Wreath assembled with the candles. I might work on Christmas cards. It will be a quiet day without much activity. I want to be able to go to church tomorrow morning and then to another Frontenacs' hockey game tomorrow afternoon. I am tired and need this rest day today.

Day 26 to Day 30 - Recovering and Update

Wednesday, November 29

I last posted on Saturday when I didn't have a good day. I indicated that I had hoped to go to church on Sunday morning. Sunday morning, I awoke and still was not feeling well. My stomach was queasy and I was very tired. I slept in and was not able to be up and going to church in time. It was close to 12 noon before my stomach and digestive tract started to calm down and I was able to get dressed.

At that point, on Sunday, Hubby wanted to get me out of the house and go for a walk at the local conservation area. I agreed because it has benches placed along the pathways for people to sit and rest. We took some birdseed with us. We had fun holding the seed in our hands and letting the birds come to us to eat. I had Chickadees, Northern Flickers and even a Downy Woodpecker land on my hand and gently take the seeds. When the birds land on your hand, it tickles and you don't even feel them take the seeds from your hand. The wind was cold and bitter on Sunday so we didn't stay out long. I did have to avail myself to the benches along the way in order to rest. It was nice to get out into the fresh air.

On Monday evening, Hubby and I went for a walk in the local mall. The last time I did the "mall walk", I was able to walk 75% of the mall before I had to sit and rest. This time I was able to walk the whole mall and climb the stairs to the second level at the end in order to go to the car. After reaching the top of the stairs, I had to rest on benches just inside the mall doors. This was progress though because I had walked the whole mall. After we got home on Monday night, Hubby and I settled into his man cave and watched two episodes of "Outlander" that we had missed while I was in hospital.

Tuesday, I enjoyed an afternoon walk with one of my good friends who lives around the corner from me. I was pleased that I was able to walk the distance although I'm not walking as fast as I used to. That will come. My friend and I enjoyed a lovely time of catching up after our walk. Tuesday evening, Hubby and I watched three more episodes of "Outlander". I really love this series of books and I'm enjoying the television series just as much.

I must add here that it is important for me to go to bed by 9 or 9:30 at the latest. If I go to bed any later than that, then I don't feel as well the next day..

On Wednesday (yesterday), I got myself up and going so that I could go to the Hospital Auxiliary's Christmas Bazaar. I drove Hubby to where he had to work and then drove the car to his office and parked it. I walked to the hospital from his work. I used to do this on a regular basis, but this is the first time I've attempted that walk since I've been home. It was a little daunting but I managed to do it. Then I still had to walk throughout the hospital and through the Bazaar. This was maybe more than I was ready for. I did manage to also visit my co-worker in the hospital. She had a baby boy on Monday. I was glad I got to see her before she was discharged to go home. By the time I made my way back to the Bazaar, I had to rest. I had bought a "refreshment ticket" for a cup of tea and a scone so I took advantage of the tables that were set and I sat. At that point, I enjoyed my tea and scone. I also enjoyed several visits with co-workers and volunteers that I have worked with. I did manage to pick up a few items for stocking stuffers and a baked good for Hubby and I. It was sticky buns with nuts and green & red cherries. We had a couple for dessert and they were delicious! After dinner, Hubby and I settled back down into the man cave and watched the last episode of Outlander. We are now caught up and ready for the next episode which will air on Sunday night.

Today, Thursday, I'm looking forward to going out with my cousin-in-law in the afternoon to another Christmas Craft Show and then dinner out with Hubby. I may even get some grocery shopping done in the morning if I feel up to it.

Day 26 - A Reality Check

I was so hopeful and looking forward to going to the Jingle Bell Tea at my church this afternoon. Unfortunately, my body decided to give me a reality check this morning which changed my plans. I had my breakfast and I took my pills. I was feeling very tired and also could feel my bowels getting ready to move.

I was glad that there was going to be movement as it means that my body is getting back to normal with regularity. Unfortunately, my stomach also decided to heave at the same time. I still was hoping that I could rest and get myself back to normal so that I could go out to the Jingle Bell Tea. This was not to be.

My taste buds have been soured for the full day. I did eat a piece of toast with butter for my lunch and then had some chicken noodle soup later in the afternoon. The day wasn't a complete waste as I managed to make some chili that is our traditional meal during on Grey Cup Sunday. I did have a small bowl at supper tonight. So far everything is staying down but my taste buds are definitely soured.

Here's hoping that I will continue to be settled tonight. I'm still hoping to attend church in the morning.

Day 24 and Day 25 - Embracing Life As Best I Can

Day 24 - Thursday, November 23

I spent my morning carrying Christmas tote boxes from the basement to the living room. I was hoping to begin the process of putting up my Christmas tree in the living room and also start displaying my Christmas decorations and figurines. I overestimated my ability to do these things. Just carrying the boxes upstairs tired me out for the morning. I held onto a faint hope of being able to decorate in the evening.

In the afternoon, I went for a lovely walk with my cousin-in-law who now lives in Kingston. We enjoyed our visit while I got some much needed exercise. I was very pleased with myself in that I was able to walk somewhat briskly. I was very tired by the time I got back home but we walked several blocks. We continued our visit. We seem to have a connection at various intellectual levels. We have some similar interests and this feeds our conversation. I am enjoying this newfound friendship. It is the first time ever that I have had family in the same city as me.

Due to my walk, I was too tired in the evening to decorate. I had a great day and I can always start the decorating tomorrow. However, I was able to do a load of laundry and get it dried.

Day 25 - Friday, November 24

When I awoke this morning, I was feeling a little weak and dizzy. Oh, oh! This means that I didn't drink enough yesterday. I'll have to do better with that today. I fed my cat, Frodo, and then I went downstairs to get the laundry that I had done last night. I took it out of the dryer, folded it and brought it upstairs. Now I had to sit. Who would have thought that I would take satisfaction in just folding and carrying laundry up the stairs. After resting, I made some coffee as it can count as part of my hydration and I really like my cup or two of coffee in the mornings. I realized I needed to rest for a bit, so I picked up my knitting (another sock) and worked quietly away while I rested. Hubby was very tired and sore as he had volunteered with Habitat for Humanity yesterday. Finally, my coffee was ready and I got my first cup. I sipped on it while I continued to knit. Hubby awoke and slowly made his way to the couch with his coffee. I feel so bad for him. I worry about him too because he is out of shape and he worked hard physically yesterday. Anyway, we enjoyed our coffees and then it was time for me to get my breakfast. My body was feeling better already.

After having my breakfast, I continued to knit until I finished the one sock. Now I was motivated to get decorating. But....it was now lunch time. So I made myself an omelet and a salad. After lunch, I managed to get the tree up but only partially decorated before I ran out of energy. While I was working on the tree, I was listening to Christmas music and then I found a lovely Christmas movie on television which I enjoyed.

In the afternoon, a parcel was delivered with my Hubby's name on it. I called and let him know it had arrived. He specifically told me not to open it. OK...Christmas is coming up and who knows what he has been buying and for whom. Also in the afternoon, a friend of mine delivered 3 jars of my favourite relish that she makes. What a gift! I love to use her relish on my sandwiches and hamburgers. Most likely, the jars won't last long.

Also, in the afternoon, Hubby called to say that he would pick up my pizza on his way home. He is off to a concert with another friend this evening and I was going to treat myself to a Hawaiian pizza from our favourite pizzeria in town. They make a great crust and their pizzas are never overdone. For those who don't know, a Hawaiian pizza has ham and pineapple along with the mozzarella cheese and pizza sauce. When Hubby arrived home, we enjoyed some pizza together. Then it was time for him to leave. I met his friend at the front door as I am also good friends with him. It was great to see him. He came to visit me while I was in the hospital and I really enjoyed my visit with him then. We're also friends with his wife who I last saw in September.  Tonight, she sent with her hubby some gifts for me. She sent me a magazine and 2 soap pumps with Christmas scents.  I have read the magazine tonight and then I watched some hockey and also the Christmas shows "Frosty the Snowman" and "Frosty Returns". These have been cartoons that I have watched since I was a child. It is part of the Christmas tradition.

I love Christmas and the season of Advent. I think my favourite part is Advent where I find my soul is prepared in a peaceful manner for the anticipation of Christmas. I am much more attuned to the sacred part of Christmas rather than the consumerism and materialism of Christmas. My favourite decorations in my home are the ones with a sacred meaning. I light my Advent wreath with its candles every day during Advent and reflect on the meaning of each week in Advent. I also love my nativity scene that includes a wooden stable that a very good friend made for me about 26 years ago. I also treasure my nativity decoration that hangs in the window. It used to have lights that would light it up at night but they stopped working a number of years ago and there is no way to fix it. I love this decoration in my window because during the day, the daylight brightness shines through it and makes it glow. I have even found some Christmas tree ornaments that show the 3 Kings following the star.

Christmas has always meant a lot to me. I remember being pregnant during Advent when my daughter was born on Christmas day. It is a very special time. On top of all this, I truly love the family time that we share over the holidays. I find this year I am feeling even more sentimental about Advent and Christmas due to my major illness and treatment. I have so much to be thankful for. I'm not just thankful for my health, but also for all my friends and family that have been so very supportive throughout the last number of months. No wonder I'm embracing life as best I can.