Sunday, 19 February 2012

Day 18 - 2nd Chemo Cycle

So I've strung together quite a few good days.  The difference I notice between this cycle and the first cycle of chemotherapy is that I'm more tired on my good days than I was in the first cycle.

My intention last night was to go to bed early so that I would awake with energy so that I could go to church this morning.  I did wake up early (7 a.m.) and I got up so I could have breakfast and get ready for church.  Unfortunately, I started getting tired already at 8 a.m.  I went back to bed with the intention of getting up at 9:15 so I could still go to church.  I went back to sleep and didn't wake up until 10:45 a.m.  This is abnormal for me as I am normally (before cancer) a morning person and once I'm up then I'm good to go for the day.  I'm still adjusting to being tired more easily.

So I didn't "do" anything today so that I could have the energy to go out for dinner tonight in celebration of our son's 18th birthday.  He chose to go to the Lone Star and we had a great time.  I wore a baseball cap because a touque would have been too warm inside.  Even with just the baseball cap, I was getting too warm.  My daughter suggested taking the cap off.  I couldn't do that.  Just as we were finishing our dinner, I saw some of my students and their families.  It was really nice to see them and I was glad I was feeling good.  I'm always afraid to "scare" my students if they see me when I'm not very well.

I find that the last couple of days I've had an underlying anxiety about the upcoming chemo treatment.  I really don't like the first week afterwards.  I'm dealing with the anxiety by reminding myself that I will continue the laxatives right from the first day of the cycle.   I'm also reminding myself that this cycle I'll getting chiropractic adjustments to help keep things "flowing".  Hopefully, the cycle will go better this time.  After this treatment, I'll be halfway through the process.  Everyone says how strong I've been.  It's easy to be strong when you don't know what's coming.  It is much more difficult to be strong when you know what's going to happen and how you're going to feel.  I don't feel as mentally strong this time around.

1 comment:

  1. Cathy, you have lots of people who will take your load and give you strength. We all love you and know that you will have what you need to get through this. I wish I was closer but I pray for you every day and send you good positive vibes. You are strong and lean on those that are there.