Friday, October 13 - Day 15
I awoke on Friday morning and I still had a low grade fever. This meant it was not high enough to go to visit the Emergency Department at the hospital but there was still a fever. Late Friday morning, I had an appointment at the CBI Health Clinic to get my Neupogen shots. While there, I asked the nurse to take my temperature. It was normal. What a relief! I wondered if it was my thermometer acting up so I took my temperature when I got home and yes, it was normal. So I don't know what caused the temperature. I do know that my sinuses are congested in the morning so maybe I'm just coming down with a cold. Hubby was away at Port Dover with his motorcycle celebrating Friday the 13th. I had encouraged him to go but I do know he was worrying about me. I texted him that my temperature was normal and not to worry. I continued to fill my waking hours with reading and knitting. I have finished a pair of Small socks (Ladies size 5,6) and I have now started a pair of Large socks (Ladies size 9,10).
Saturday, October 14 - Day 16
I did not sleep well. I am filled with fear. I have been filled with this fear for many weeks. From the time of diagnosis back in August, I have been dreading this period of time that I'm now entering. I am not sleeping well because of it. I am filling my time with knitting to keep my mind and hands busy so that I don't sink into the dark pit of fear and despair. Way back in August, I was afraid of my chemo sessions because the doctor described them as harsh. The chemo has been worse than it was 5 years ago but I've managed to get through it fairly well. Back in August, I was also very afraid of the stem cell process. Each time I would start to think about it, I would tell myself that I'm getting ahead of where I need to be and I would repeat in my mind, "One breath at a time, one moment at a time, one step at a time." This helped to push the thoughts of the stem cell collection and high dose chemo to the back of my mind. Well now the stem cell collection process is at hand. I'll be starting it on Tuesday.
I am afraid. Not just anxious. Not just worried. AFRAID!! In an effort to calm myself, I knit. I read. It's not helping now. I am afraid of having the catheter put into my neck so they can collect the stem cells. This will go in on Tuesday. I will be at the Stem Cell Unit all day Tuesday and then come home. I'll do the same thing on Wednesday and Thursday as an outpatient which means I come home each night. Each of these days, I am there from 7:30 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. as they need to collect 2.5 millions stem cells from me.
I feel like I'm on a train that is going full speed and I can't get off. I'm terrified of the high dose chemo that is scheduled for October 26 and 27. At this point, I can still turn off the thoughts of that because it is over a week away. I can still use "one step at a time".
As I deal with this deep fear I'm currently feeling, I continue to pray for peace of mind. I continue to knit to calm myself. But the fear raises its head while I try to sleep. I've been told that I'm brave and courageous. I'm really not. I'm just mundanely going through my day and the process as it is laid out for me. As I go through these days, I struggle with my deep fear of what's coming up.
Hubby did come home from Port Dover. We went out for dinner as there are very few days left that I will be able to do this.
Sunday, 15 October 2017
Thursday, 12 October 2017
Day 14 Third Chemo Round - Friendly visit and Low Grade Fever
At my urging, my hubby left this morning to join his friend and the two of them ride their motorcycles to Port Dover for tomorrow's Friday The 13th Celebration. Shortly after he left, I went and had my picc line cleaned and also to get my Neupogen injections.
Over the lunch hour, I knitted some more on the socks I'm currently working on for the homeless. I'll drop them off at Kingston Street Mission when I have a few to give them. I was looking forward to seeing a good friend who had offered to help me get my gardens in a small semblance of order. They are over run with weeds. My friend arrived just after lunch. She immediately tackled my vegetable garden which I have left unplanted this year. As she worked in the veggie garden, I started to cut back some of the old grape vines that continue to grow wild in my flowerbed. I also dug out some nasty thistles that were growing in my herb garden. Then I had to sit down for most of the rest of the afternoon. I visited with my friend while she continued to dig out the weeds and turn the soil in my garden by hand with a shovel.
My neighbour behind me called me over to the fence and asked if I would like to borrow his rotortiller. Hubby and I have used it before so I said yes instantly. My friend had a great time using it and was impressed with it. She was also impressed with how good my soil was looking. It has helped that we had a good soaking of rain last weekend and then again yesterday. Once the veggie garden was done, my friend took a well-deserved break with some iced tea in a glass with lots of ice. After a bit, she got up and started on my flowerbed that surrounds my patio. She got all the weeds pulled and the soil smoothed nicely with her hands. I love the smell of dirt and her work brought that smell to the fore.
We both worked together to tidy up the mess of weeds. I had a box that we filled and an extral large industrial sized garbage bag that we also filled. I will get my hubby to deliver it to our municipal composting site. I felt good that I was able to move the bag and the box into the garage. The Neupogen seems to make my heart race and I get out of breath very quickly. I'll be mentioning that to my nurse practitioner when I see her again.
It was late afternoon and close to dinner time when my friend left. What a wonderful afternoon we had together! I wish I was healthier that I could have done more but I really enjoyed her company and was glad I could do some physical work.
Tonight, I decided to just relax and take it easy. I hadn't taken my temperature since lunch time, so I took my temperature. It was 100.1. I've been monitoring it all evening and it has gone from 99.7 to 100.1 This is a low grade fever. If it goes over 11.4 for over an hour, then I have to go visit the Emergency Department of our local hospital. There is a whole protocol that the staff in Emergency have to follow for me because I'm on high dose Neupogen. I have a "Fever Card" and a stack of papers that I have to take with me if I go to Emergency. So far the temperature hasn't gone up high enough. I am tired. I have noticed that my heart wants to pound and race. I am getting breathless very easily this afternoon and tonight. I have to go to the Health Clinic tomorrow to have my next Neupogen injections. If this fever is still there in the morning, I'll mention it to the nurse and have her take my temperature. I'm off to bed early tonight. Let's pray that the temperature will go down.
Over the lunch hour, I knitted some more on the socks I'm currently working on for the homeless. I'll drop them off at Kingston Street Mission when I have a few to give them. I was looking forward to seeing a good friend who had offered to help me get my gardens in a small semblance of order. They are over run with weeds. My friend arrived just after lunch. She immediately tackled my vegetable garden which I have left unplanted this year. As she worked in the veggie garden, I started to cut back some of the old grape vines that continue to grow wild in my flowerbed. I also dug out some nasty thistles that were growing in my herb garden. Then I had to sit down for most of the rest of the afternoon. I visited with my friend while she continued to dig out the weeds and turn the soil in my garden by hand with a shovel.
My neighbour behind me called me over to the fence and asked if I would like to borrow his rotortiller. Hubby and I have used it before so I said yes instantly. My friend had a great time using it and was impressed with it. She was also impressed with how good my soil was looking. It has helped that we had a good soaking of rain last weekend and then again yesterday. Once the veggie garden was done, my friend took a well-deserved break with some iced tea in a glass with lots of ice. After a bit, she got up and started on my flowerbed that surrounds my patio. She got all the weeds pulled and the soil smoothed nicely with her hands. I love the smell of dirt and her work brought that smell to the fore.
We both worked together to tidy up the mess of weeds. I had a box that we filled and an extral large industrial sized garbage bag that we also filled. I will get my hubby to deliver it to our municipal composting site. I felt good that I was able to move the bag and the box into the garage. The Neupogen seems to make my heart race and I get out of breath very quickly. I'll be mentioning that to my nurse practitioner when I see her again.
It was late afternoon and close to dinner time when my friend left. What a wonderful afternoon we had together! I wish I was healthier that I could have done more but I really enjoyed her company and was glad I could do some physical work.
Tonight, I decided to just relax and take it easy. I hadn't taken my temperature since lunch time, so I took my temperature. It was 100.1. I've been monitoring it all evening and it has gone from 99.7 to 100.1 This is a low grade fever. If it goes over 11.4 for over an hour, then I have to go visit the Emergency Department of our local hospital. There is a whole protocol that the staff in Emergency have to follow for me because I'm on high dose Neupogen. I have a "Fever Card" and a stack of papers that I have to take with me if I go to Emergency. So far the temperature hasn't gone up high enough. I am tired. I have noticed that my heart wants to pound and race. I am getting breathless very easily this afternoon and tonight. I have to go to the Health Clinic tomorrow to have my next Neupogen injections. If this fever is still there in the morning, I'll mention it to the nurse and have her take my temperature. I'm off to bed early tonight. Let's pray that the temperature will go down.
Wednesday, 11 October 2017
Day 13 Third Chemo Round - A Day at the Hospital
This morning I had a very early breakfast. I couldn't have anything to eat or drink after 8:30 a.m. because I was having a CT scan at 11:00 a.m. I had to report to the Stem Cell Unit before going to the Imaging Department for my CT scan. The nurse practioner wanted to check my vital statistics to make sure I'm not running a fever. She also wanted to make sure that I wasn't dehydrated. Everything went well until I mentioned the side effect of the Neupogen that I felt last night. As soon as I mentioned a racing heart beat and pain in my chest, the nurse practitioner booked me for an ECG. The nurse practitioner was being diligent in checking me over fully. I had 8 vials of blood taken from me. Six of those vials were put into a culture tube to check and see if I have any infections coursing through my body. The nurse was also having problems with my picc line. She was able to flush the line (inject saline into it) but she couldn't get any blood from it. So another kind of medication was injected into me using the picc line and I had to wait for 30 minutes before the nurse could try again to use the picc line to get blood from me.
I was starting to worry that I was going to miss my 11:00 appointment for the CT scan. I arrived at the Stem Cell Unit at 9:15 a.m. The nurse and nurse practitioner managed to get my blood taken out of me for testing before 11 a.m. They had to cancel the ECG machine request. This meant that I had to go back to the Stem Cell Unit after my CT scan in order to have the ECG done. Thank goodness I had the CT scan done with no problems. I then hurried back up to the Stem Cell Unit. After another 15 to 20 minute wait, I finally had the ECG done. I was then free to leave as the ECG was normal.
As I was taking the elevators down to the front entrance of the hospital, I called hubby to come and pick me up. I spent the rest of the afternoon relaxing and reading a book at his work. When I woke up this morning, I did not expect to spend so much time at the hospital. Thank goodness I had no other appointments to run off to.
Last night, a friend asked me what the Neupogen will do for me. I'm on a high dose of Neupogen. I'm getting the Neupogen injections so that it will stimulate the growth of my stem cells and also release them into my blood stream. Next Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday I will be an outpatient of the Stem Cell Unit and they will use a dialysis machine to harvest my stem cells from my blood stream. They need to harvest 2.5 million stem cells over three days next week. They will then freeze them and on October 30 all my frozen stem cells will be re-injected into me. I hope this helps you understand the process a little better.
I finished another book today, entitlted "The Guest List" by Fern Michaels. I did a lot of reading while I was waiting for all my appointments. Considering I had to miss some meals and limit my liquid intake, I had a good day.
I was starting to worry that I was going to miss my 11:00 appointment for the CT scan. I arrived at the Stem Cell Unit at 9:15 a.m. The nurse and nurse practitioner managed to get my blood taken out of me for testing before 11 a.m. They had to cancel the ECG machine request. This meant that I had to go back to the Stem Cell Unit after my CT scan in order to have the ECG done. Thank goodness I had the CT scan done with no problems. I then hurried back up to the Stem Cell Unit. After another 15 to 20 minute wait, I finally had the ECG done. I was then free to leave as the ECG was normal.
As I was taking the elevators down to the front entrance of the hospital, I called hubby to come and pick me up. I spent the rest of the afternoon relaxing and reading a book at his work. When I woke up this morning, I did not expect to spend so much time at the hospital. Thank goodness I had no other appointments to run off to.
Last night, a friend asked me what the Neupogen will do for me. I'm on a high dose of Neupogen. I'm getting the Neupogen injections so that it will stimulate the growth of my stem cells and also release them into my blood stream. Next Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday I will be an outpatient of the Stem Cell Unit and they will use a dialysis machine to harvest my stem cells from my blood stream. They need to harvest 2.5 million stem cells over three days next week. They will then freeze them and on October 30 all my frozen stem cells will be re-injected into me. I hope this helps you understand the process a little better.
I finished another book today, entitlted "The Guest List" by Fern Michaels. I did a lot of reading while I was waiting for all my appointments. Considering I had to miss some meals and limit my liquid intake, I had a good day.
Tuesday, 10 October 2017
Day 12 Third Chemo Round - Neupogen side effects
Yesterday (Day 11, Third Chemo Round) was a great day. I was able to eat turkey dinner leftovers without any nausea. This was due to keeping up with the anti-nausea medications. I'm still on two antibiotic medications. One is for the pain and swelling in my left lower arm. The other is one that I have to take along with the Neupogen which I started taking yesterday. I had to go to the CBI Health Clinic (formerly CCAC) to have the high dose Neupogen needles. I had such a good day yesterday that I forgot to blog. That's the sign of a great day!
As I mentioned, I started the Neupogen injections yesterday. This morning I had to go again for the 2 needles. Yesterday the needles were put into the right side of my abdomen. This morning the nurse put the 2 vials into one needle and injected it into my upper right arm. I had a good day and my nausea was under control until this evening. I just have to make sure I keep taking the Olanzapine and the Ondansetron to keep the nausea under control.
Tonight, my body is starting to show the side effects of the high dose Neupogen. My left hip really hurts and the muscle feels weak when I get up from sitting. My right knee is also starting to ache when I walk. This has been my fear leading up to taking the Neupogen. I'm afraid the pain is going to be debilitating. Then I just remind myself that I can take some Tylenol to help ease the pain. I do have anxiety about the side effects of the various medications that I take. I try to hand these worries over to God to carry for me. So far that has helped keep me from being too frazzled. This Neupogen scares me though. So does the thought of having the high dose chemo on Oct. 26 and 27.
Tomorrow I go for my CT scan to see if the tumours have shrunk at least 50 percent. This is the final test that I have to pass in order to have the stem cell transplant. Here's hoping they have shrunk that much already. I do have to go to the hospital early so that the Stem Cell Unit nurse can take my vital signs and give me my Neupogen injections. I'll take advantage of being at the hospital to return some books to my former co-worker and to say hello to some of the volunteers.
Tomorrow will be a busy day.
As I mentioned, I started the Neupogen injections yesterday. This morning I had to go again for the 2 needles. Yesterday the needles were put into the right side of my abdomen. This morning the nurse put the 2 vials into one needle and injected it into my upper right arm. I had a good day and my nausea was under control until this evening. I just have to make sure I keep taking the Olanzapine and the Ondansetron to keep the nausea under control.
Tonight, my body is starting to show the side effects of the high dose Neupogen. My left hip really hurts and the muscle feels weak when I get up from sitting. My right knee is also starting to ache when I walk. This has been my fear leading up to taking the Neupogen. I'm afraid the pain is going to be debilitating. Then I just remind myself that I can take some Tylenol to help ease the pain. I do have anxiety about the side effects of the various medications that I take. I try to hand these worries over to God to carry for me. So far that has helped keep me from being too frazzled. This Neupogen scares me though. So does the thought of having the high dose chemo on Oct. 26 and 27.
Tomorrow I go for my CT scan to see if the tumours have shrunk at least 50 percent. This is the final test that I have to pass in order to have the stem cell transplant. Here's hoping they have shrunk that much already. I do have to go to the hospital early so that the Stem Cell Unit nurse can take my vital signs and give me my Neupogen injections. I'll take advantage of being at the hospital to return some books to my former co-worker and to say hello to some of the volunteers.
Tomorrow will be a busy day.
Sunday, 8 October 2017
Day 10 Third Chemo Round - Happy Thanksgiving!
Today was our Canadian Thanksgiving. This is typically a time where we celebrate our blessings and are thankful for the bountiful harvest of the summer vegetables. It is often a time of extended family getting together and enjoying a turkey dinner with all the trimmings. Unfortunately, our daughter had to work in her city where she's living. It's 2 hours away. However, we have our son home for the holiday weekend and staying until Wednesday. Hubby and our son put together the turkey dinner celebration today for the three of us. From the time I awoke this morning (6 a.m. in order to take some medications), I was hoping that my nausea would be controlled enough with medications that I could enjoy the turkey dinner.
I love turkey dinners with stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, vegetables and finished off with pies for dessert. I can never get tired of eating turkey. So I was very vigilant on making sure I was drinking enough liquid, taking my medications with food and on time all day. With some help from my son, I was able to do two loads of laundry and hang it on the line to dry. That activity left me feeling dizzy and weak so I sat down and knitted or watched television.
Hubby made eggs and bacon for breakfast and I was able to eat some of that. I then picked the sage and parsley from my garden to be used in the stuffing that would fill the turkey cavity. It made me feel good to be able to help in some small way with the dinner. I know I made the pies earlier in the week but I like to help with preparing the meal.
We spent the afternoon watching baseball and football on television. I made sure I was on time with all my medications and I made sure I was staying hydrated. I did notice that the cysplatin (chemo drug) is playing havoc with my hearing. I've had some ringing of the ears the last few days. Today my hearing was very muffled. I'm hoping this will not be a permanent hearing loss.
As I reflected on Thanksgiving and our blessings, I was blessed today with some good medications to keep me feeling normal. I was blessed to be strong enough to hang the laundry and sit outside in the morning. I was blessed with the company of my hubby and son. We were very blessed to enjoy a full turkey dinner. As always with turkey, I probably ate too much as I was very, very full when we finished. I was still feeling full when it was time to take the Clindamycin (normally taken with food) so I just took the pill without eating something first. As I continue to count my blessings, I am blessed with the love of family and friends. Sometimes as I go through all this chemo and the side effects, I get grumpy and tired of it all. My hubby and son were my blessings today as they put up with me. We enjoyed our dinner. We really enjoyed the pies with whipped cream.
So I end by saying Happy Thanksgiving and count your blessings at the end of each day. It helps.
I love turkey dinners with stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, vegetables and finished off with pies for dessert. I can never get tired of eating turkey. So I was very vigilant on making sure I was drinking enough liquid, taking my medications with food and on time all day. With some help from my son, I was able to do two loads of laundry and hang it on the line to dry. That activity left me feeling dizzy and weak so I sat down and knitted or watched television.
Hubby made eggs and bacon for breakfast and I was able to eat some of that. I then picked the sage and parsley from my garden to be used in the stuffing that would fill the turkey cavity. It made me feel good to be able to help in some small way with the dinner. I know I made the pies earlier in the week but I like to help with preparing the meal.
We spent the afternoon watching baseball and football on television. I made sure I was on time with all my medications and I made sure I was staying hydrated. I did notice that the cysplatin (chemo drug) is playing havoc with my hearing. I've had some ringing of the ears the last few days. Today my hearing was very muffled. I'm hoping this will not be a permanent hearing loss.
As I reflected on Thanksgiving and our blessings, I was blessed today with some good medications to keep me feeling normal. I was blessed to be strong enough to hang the laundry and sit outside in the morning. I was blessed with the company of my hubby and son. We were very blessed to enjoy a full turkey dinner. As always with turkey, I probably ate too much as I was very, very full when we finished. I was still feeling full when it was time to take the Clindamycin (normally taken with food) so I just took the pill without eating something first. As I continue to count my blessings, I am blessed with the love of family and friends. Sometimes as I go through all this chemo and the side effects, I get grumpy and tired of it all. My hubby and son were my blessings today as they put up with me. We enjoyed our dinner. We really enjoyed the pies with whipped cream.
So I end by saying Happy Thanksgiving and count your blessings at the end of each day. It helps.
Saturday, 7 October 2017
Day 9 Third Chemo Round - Juggling Medications, hydration and small meals
Today I felt much better after drinking more than the required 8 glasses today. What a schedule to juggle though. I'm on 4 different medications. Some need to be taken with food. One need lots of water/liquid to be taken. One needs to be taken every 6 hours. One needs to be taken every 8 hours. One needs to be taken between 7 & 8 p.m. at night.
I find this onerous to juggle the medication schedule, getting the required liquid intake and still trying to eat meals with my family when I'm full from the food that needs to be eaten with medication between meals. So I'm eating smaller amounts during the "regular meals" and eating snacks with the medications. This medication schedule also means a disrupted night unless I can time the medication to be taken at midnight and again at 6 a.m.
The nausea didn't raise its ugly head until just after supper. So I took my new anti-nausea medication which is faster acting and hope it will settle my stomach before I head off to bed. The side effect of this new medication is dizziness and drowsiness. This is why it's best to take it in the evening. It is a 12 hour medication though so hopefully it will last the night.
I had some time to myself while hubby and my son did some last minute grocery shopping. I finished the current novel I was reading by Danielle Steele entitled "Blue". This was a book that a friend loaned to me a few weeks ago. I'm not normally a Danielle Steele fan but I did enjoy this book. Tonight, I'll start my next book by Fern Michaels called "The Guest List".
I enjoyed having my son home today. We spent some time together which was really nice. Tomorrow he will help my hubby prepare our turkey dinner. I'm hoping I will be able to enjoy it with them.
I find this onerous to juggle the medication schedule, getting the required liquid intake and still trying to eat meals with my family when I'm full from the food that needs to be eaten with medication between meals. So I'm eating smaller amounts during the "regular meals" and eating snacks with the medications. This medication schedule also means a disrupted night unless I can time the medication to be taken at midnight and again at 6 a.m.
The nausea didn't raise its ugly head until just after supper. So I took my new anti-nausea medication which is faster acting and hope it will settle my stomach before I head off to bed. The side effect of this new medication is dizziness and drowsiness. This is why it's best to take it in the evening. It is a 12 hour medication though so hopefully it will last the night.
I had some time to myself while hubby and my son did some last minute grocery shopping. I finished the current novel I was reading by Danielle Steele entitled "Blue". This was a book that a friend loaned to me a few weeks ago. I'm not normally a Danielle Steele fan but I did enjoy this book. Tonight, I'll start my next book by Fern Michaels called "The Guest List".
I enjoyed having my son home today. We spent some time together which was really nice. Tomorrow he will help my hubby prepare our turkey dinner. I'm hoping I will be able to enjoy it with them.
Friday, 6 October 2017
Day 8 Third Chemo Round - Dehydration and Chemo
This morning I awoke early and went to have my shower. I got very dizzy and was concerned while in the shower. I quickly did what I had to do and dried myself while sitting on the toilet so I wouldn't fall. This scared me.
I was at the Stem Cell Unit for my chemo by 8:30 a.m. The nurse checked my vital statistics and my blood pressure was very low and my heart rate was at 120 beats per minute. My normal heart rate is usually between 45 and 55 beats per minute. This caused a flurry of activity and the fluids were pumped into me. I took 1.5 Litres of fluid to bring my vital statistics to where the staff were comfortable. I also had my Day 8 chemo of Gemcitabine.
My nausea is what caused the dehydration. Although I never actually got sick, the nauseous feeling discouraged me from eating and drinking. My taste buds have changed again and I'm struggling to find a liquid that I like to drink. Today, I enjoyed some apple cider while I had my chemo and liquids pumped into me. I also like chocolate milk. I'm going to try Schweppes Gingerale with ice (watered down as it melts) and see if that is another option for liquid.
I also have a small infection in my left arm where the IV went in for my very first chemo. That infection had flared up in late August and it showed up again yesterday morning. So I'm back on Clindamycin for 7 days to deal with this. The Practical RN that was assigned to my file also has given me a new anti-nausea drug to see if that will help me more.
As I go into Thanksgiving weekend, I'm on a strict schedule of medications that need to be taken at certain times, some with food, some with lots of water, some with nothing. So I'm back to having a "medicine journal" to try and keep it all tracked and doing what I'm supposed to be doing.
Today wasn't a complete downer though. I had two former co-workers come up to visit with me which helped lift my spirits. I am struggling to accept my regimented life. I just want to be done with all this and eat when I want, what I want, drink when I want, take no medications. However, starting Monday, I will also be taking another medication every morning at the health clinic where my picc line gets cleaned. I want to be able to go to crowded fun places with my hubby and son. I don't like feeling cooped up and penned in. So I'm feeling a little sorry for myself today.
But....it's Thanksgiving weekend and I'm thankful that my son has come home for the weekend. I'm thankful that my hubby knows how to cook well. I'm thankful that I got an apple pie made for my hubby and a pumpkin pie made for my son. I did something to add to the meal even though I may not eat much of it. I'm thankful for all my friends and family who continue to pray for me and lift me with their cards and written thoughts. So Happy Thanksgiving and I'll try to focus on my blessings instead of what I can't do or have to do.
I was at the Stem Cell Unit for my chemo by 8:30 a.m. The nurse checked my vital statistics and my blood pressure was very low and my heart rate was at 120 beats per minute. My normal heart rate is usually between 45 and 55 beats per minute. This caused a flurry of activity and the fluids were pumped into me. I took 1.5 Litres of fluid to bring my vital statistics to where the staff were comfortable. I also had my Day 8 chemo of Gemcitabine.
My nausea is what caused the dehydration. Although I never actually got sick, the nauseous feeling discouraged me from eating and drinking. My taste buds have changed again and I'm struggling to find a liquid that I like to drink. Today, I enjoyed some apple cider while I had my chemo and liquids pumped into me. I also like chocolate milk. I'm going to try Schweppes Gingerale with ice (watered down as it melts) and see if that is another option for liquid.
I also have a small infection in my left arm where the IV went in for my very first chemo. That infection had flared up in late August and it showed up again yesterday morning. So I'm back on Clindamycin for 7 days to deal with this. The Practical RN that was assigned to my file also has given me a new anti-nausea drug to see if that will help me more.
As I go into Thanksgiving weekend, I'm on a strict schedule of medications that need to be taken at certain times, some with food, some with lots of water, some with nothing. So I'm back to having a "medicine journal" to try and keep it all tracked and doing what I'm supposed to be doing.
Today wasn't a complete downer though. I had two former co-workers come up to visit with me which helped lift my spirits. I am struggling to accept my regimented life. I just want to be done with all this and eat when I want, what I want, drink when I want, take no medications. However, starting Monday, I will also be taking another medication every morning at the health clinic where my picc line gets cleaned. I want to be able to go to crowded fun places with my hubby and son. I don't like feeling cooped up and penned in. So I'm feeling a little sorry for myself today.
But....it's Thanksgiving weekend and I'm thankful that my son has come home for the weekend. I'm thankful that my hubby knows how to cook well. I'm thankful that I got an apple pie made for my hubby and a pumpkin pie made for my son. I did something to add to the meal even though I may not eat much of it. I'm thankful for all my friends and family who continue to pray for me and lift me with their cards and written thoughts. So Happy Thanksgiving and I'll try to focus on my blessings instead of what I can't do or have to do.
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