Day 18 - 5th Chemo Cycle

I'm tired today.  It's been a busy week although very enjoyable.  I took it easy today although I did get out for a walk at the local conservation area.  After the walk, my husband took me for a drive to extend our outing.

I noticed yesterday that there is a little bit of swelling near my collarbone where the tumour had been.  It was still there today.  I'm hoping it is because I exercised it using the hedge shears.  I also noticed today that my stomach was a little queasy and I was burping more again.  I'll be keeping a close eye on all this in the next few days.  I'll be mentioning this to my doctor on Wednesday when I go for my check up.  As always, the thought of my upcoming chemo session also makes me a little nauseous.  I have noticed in the last couple of cycles that there is a chemical smell that always seems to emanate from me.  I really don't like that smell.  It is faint but it is there.

I've been a little fearful about the "what ifs" during the last couple of days.  I have to constantly remind myself that I don't want to be robbed of the enjoyment of the present by worrying about things I can't control in the future.  The walk at the conservation area helped to distract me.  Reading also helps to distract me.  Knitting used to help distract me but doesn't seem to at the moment.

Tomorrow I'm hoping to transplant my tomato plants and pepper plants into bigger pots.  This might help lift my spirits.  Our water is going to be shut off for the day as the utilities company works in our area outdoors.  I'll have to make sure I fill our 5 gallon water jug with water along with some other jugs so that I have enough water to use in the transplanting as well as for drinking water and making tea.  I think I'll fill the bathtub with water and keep a bucket nearby so that I can still use the toilet throughout the day.  This will be a little like camping as I'll have to heat my water up for washing/sterilizing planting pots.  So tomorrow will be an adventure that will help to distract me from my fears.

Here's hoping it will be a challenging enough day to keep me distracted.  I'm not looking forward to being hooked up intravenously again for chemo.  Although on the bright side, in 2 weeks time I'll start to feel better and I won't have to worry about having anymore chemotherapy done (I hope).